OK, Thanksgiving is right around the corner-it is a bit early this year. You haven't even figured out whether to stay home or go out, or even who will be joining you. Your daughter got married last year and her in-laws expect them for dinner. The tug-o-war begins.
One year, I decided to forgo the customary holiday pies for dessert in favor of apple tart tatin and pumpkin creme brulee. Oh my, you would have thought I had commited a felony for deviating from the standard Thanksgiving fare.
Silly me. Yet, every year, I go in search of something different to add to my holiday repetoire, just to mix it up a bit. At least I'm not boring!
If you're having the family over, here are some simple ways to relax and enjoy the holiday-a way to be a guest at your own party:
First, ORGANIZE! Make a list of everything that needs to be done. Keep the list handy so you can alter it as needed.
Then, PRIORITIZE! Figure out the Must Do's and tackle them first. Then consider the Want To Do's, see how much time and energy you have and decide how to proceed.
Finally, DELEGATE! Ask someone else to pick up the items on your grocery list. Or consider having a service come in to clean your home. Ask guests to supply the dessert or the wine. Don't be afraid to ask for help.
The following websites are personal favorites of ours, and we want to share them with you:
rachaelray.com - for simple holiday recipes and organizational tips.
flylady.net - helps you to organize your life and simplify!
hgtv.com - for decorating ideas.
realsimple.com - for helpful holiday hints.
allrecipes.com - real recipes submitted and reviewed by real people.
We hope you will find useful tips and information to help you to be a guest at your own party!
IF YOU'RE ALONESome of us live away from our family and may be alone or with only one or two people. Maybe it's the first year you're alone or maybe it's the tenth. It doesn't matter. The holidays for some are times of stress. We think we're supposed to be happy, but we're not. We think we're supposed to embrace the holidays, but maybe fear is standing in the way.
The first few years after my husband passed away when it was just my son and I, we traveled. I always made sure we were away. That way I didn't have to worry about what we were going to do. That worked for the Christmas vacation through high school but somewhere in middle school we stopped going away for Thanksgiving. I knew that I didn't want a dinner with just him and me nor did I want a traditional restaurant. It was just too hard. The first time we were home, we went to a Japanese Hibachi restaurant and not the one we always went to. We went about 45 minutes from home, so that it would be different. In later years I had a divorced friend and her son over and then we started going to a friend's house.
Here are some suggestions for things to do if you're alone:
INVITE all the people you know who are alone and follow Mary's suggestions to have a stress free holiday.
TELL A FRIEND that you're going to be alone. Your friends are your friends and they want to be there for you. My biggest mistake through my husband's illness and after was never asking for help. I've learned people want to help.
GO TO A RESTAURANT. Find one other person who is alone, or your child, or your parent and make a reservation at a restaurant where you never get to go. Make it special.
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ASK AT YOUR HOUSE OF WORSHIP. Many churches and temples have dinners on Thanksgiving and other holidays. Many also know of people who welcome someone who is alone. Don't be embarrassed, do it. You never know you could meet your best new friends that night.
VOLUNTEER. If you're not ready for a celebration, volunteer. There are so many places that can use your help to serve meals to those who are less fortunate than we are.
The most important thing I can say is don't sit home alone. Embrace the holiday in as simple a way as you can and remember that your loved one wants you to be happy. This can be the first day of the rest of your life.
Having trouble -- call Mary or Fran or use the coupon on our November 1st newsletter.
