Wednesday, September 12, 2007
****Our Newest Book Choice-The Alchemist****
For our next book review and discussion, we have chosen The Alchemist by Paolo Coelho. Check out our link to Amazon.com to purchase this latest selection.
Monday, September 10, 2007
Empty Nester Syndrome
My son is a senior now, but it seems like only yesterday that I was taking him down to college, helping him set up his dorm room and then on Saturday, a day before I had planned, saying goodbye. As I mentioned in Musings, for someone who has lost a spouse this was another time that the other parent missed a momentous occassion. For us it was the missed bar mitzvah, missed high school graduation and now missed going off to college.
We kept it short, I shed a tear and then drove the 4 hours home talking to friends all the way. Once I was home, it was empty. Even though for the prior year, since he got his license, I hardly saw him, it was different now. How did I cope? I thought pretty well until I looked back a year later. I coped by never being home. I scheduled myself to be busy every day and most nights. Even though during his senior year we had dinner maybe twice a week, that was by choice. The curfew so that I knew he was safe - gone. My only salvation was that I knew he wasn't driving.
I had a friend who said that she went into her son's room every day and cried and that she hadn't moved anything in his room, even to close books that were out. I thought she was being extreme but maybe she was being more honest with herself than I was saying i'm ok.
What would I have done differently? Most importantly, I would have acknowledged to myself that it might be hard, that I would miss him. Instead of being strong and saying I'm fine, because no one else believed me.
I think the other most important things would have been to use the tools that I've learned since then -- journaling, meditation and coaching. If you're having trouble getting into your back to school routine or handling the empty nest, call or email us and let us help you renew your path to your vision.
We kept it short, I shed a tear and then drove the 4 hours home talking to friends all the way. Once I was home, it was empty. Even though for the prior year, since he got his license, I hardly saw him, it was different now. How did I cope? I thought pretty well until I looked back a year later. I coped by never being home. I scheduled myself to be busy every day and most nights. Even though during his senior year we had dinner maybe twice a week, that was by choice. The curfew so that I knew he was safe - gone. My only salvation was that I knew he wasn't driving.
I had a friend who said that she went into her son's room every day and cried and that she hadn't moved anything in his room, even to close books that were out. I thought she was being extreme but maybe she was being more honest with herself than I was saying i'm ok.
What would I have done differently? Most importantly, I would have acknowledged to myself that it might be hard, that I would miss him. Instead of being strong and saying I'm fine, because no one else believed me.
I think the other most important things would have been to use the tools that I've learned since then -- journaling, meditation and coaching. If you're having trouble getting into your back to school routine or handling the empty nest, call or email us and let us help you renew your path to your vision.
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